[Lsrcr]Lost_Soul - Temporary break
Posted: May 25, 2026, 11:22 am
Part of me doesn't want to be making this message. Another part of me knows I need to.
I'm not very open about my personal life. To me, that's my own burdens. I play games like SA:MP to relax and escape from the frustrations of my personal life. But that fails to be effective when SA:MP becomes its own frustration. I have done a lot in the last few weeks. Between trial mod, beta testing several updates, leading Pagati... I admit it, I've been frustrated. On top of that, I have real world frustrations as well, namely that I'll be moving soon.
Now, I won't get into the specifics, they aren't relevant. But, I vented those frustrations to a close family member I live with last night. I was so frustrated in fact that I lost the ability to sign and actually just cried. Unfortunately, my frustration was not taken the right way. I've been frustrated that I cannot do MORE for the server. But the person I vented to took it as me being overworked for no pay. They decided to take matters into their own hands and do something that would get me banned from the community via my Discord using real world access to my devices. Now, all they actually accomplished was getting me fired, which was likely coming anyways, but I'm not banned. That said, while they REALLY did it in a fucked up way, they had "good" intentions.
And those good intentions are not unfounded. They might have done something terrible, and I do see it as a betrayal of my trust in them, but the motive is pure. I have been spending literal hours every day working. For Pagati, as trial mod, as beta tester... and it has gotten to me a bit. They knew nothing they said would make me pay attention, so they went a more devious route. They know I have overworked myself. I haven't been going on walks, I haven't visited my friends, I have done nothing but work for Ls-rcr. Ignoring my nephew's first birthday party was the final straw for everyone. I felt working on the new Pagati event team was more important than some toddlers birthday. Admittedly, that's taking this too far. Especially when the work I put into it was for nothing, as the entire E-host team is being redone.
Even though my family member forced my hand in a very bad way, they are not wrong. So, I'm taking a break. I'll probably still log in every so often because I love the game, but I'm putting down my tools and notes and everything else until after I have moved into my new house and gotten settled down. That will be, at most, two weeks. When I return, I will still be the Don of Pagati and a beta tester. But people are right, I have pushed myself too far and need to step back and take a break. So that's what I'm doing. I'll still be on Discord (Which I have now taken extra measures to secure) but kindly go to someone below for any questions.
For anything Pagati related, contact Consigliere Bombshell
For Beta Testing, contact Richano, Hiresh, or Astrl
For anything staff related... you know the staff team.
I'm not very open about my personal life. To me, that's my own burdens. I play games like SA:MP to relax and escape from the frustrations of my personal life. But that fails to be effective when SA:MP becomes its own frustration. I have done a lot in the last few weeks. Between trial mod, beta testing several updates, leading Pagati... I admit it, I've been frustrated. On top of that, I have real world frustrations as well, namely that I'll be moving soon.
Now, I won't get into the specifics, they aren't relevant. But, I vented those frustrations to a close family member I live with last night. I was so frustrated in fact that I lost the ability to sign and actually just cried. Unfortunately, my frustration was not taken the right way. I've been frustrated that I cannot do MORE for the server. But the person I vented to took it as me being overworked for no pay. They decided to take matters into their own hands and do something that would get me banned from the community via my Discord using real world access to my devices. Now, all they actually accomplished was getting me fired, which was likely coming anyways, but I'm not banned. That said, while they REALLY did it in a fucked up way, they had "good" intentions.
And those good intentions are not unfounded. They might have done something terrible, and I do see it as a betrayal of my trust in them, but the motive is pure. I have been spending literal hours every day working. For Pagati, as trial mod, as beta tester... and it has gotten to me a bit. They knew nothing they said would make me pay attention, so they went a more devious route. They know I have overworked myself. I haven't been going on walks, I haven't visited my friends, I have done nothing but work for Ls-rcr. Ignoring my nephew's first birthday party was the final straw for everyone. I felt working on the new Pagati event team was more important than some toddlers birthday. Admittedly, that's taking this too far. Especially when the work I put into it was for nothing, as the entire E-host team is being redone.
Even though my family member forced my hand in a very bad way, they are not wrong. So, I'm taking a break. I'll probably still log in every so often because I love the game, but I'm putting down my tools and notes and everything else until after I have moved into my new house and gotten settled down. That will be, at most, two weeks. When I return, I will still be the Don of Pagati and a beta tester. But people are right, I have pushed myself too far and need to step back and take a break. So that's what I'm doing. I'll still be on Discord (Which I have now taken extra measures to secure) but kindly go to someone below for any questions.
For anything Pagati related, contact Consigliere Bombshell
For Beta Testing, contact Richano, Hiresh, or Astrl
For anything staff related... you know the staff team.
